So You Wanna Write a Parenting Book...

(Photo: My Daughter and her Bestie Graduating from London’s Goldsmiths this summer)

In Navy SEAL training, there’s a Creature of the Black Lagoon statue with a sign draped around its neck, “So you wanna be a Frogman…”

Not a question, more of a dare.

“So you wanna write a parenting book…”

In recent years, as my kids grew into young adults and started college, I found myself

being asked for parenting advice. The questions came from my circle of friends, new parents, and peers from business school and alumni communities, often after they’d spent time with my kids and walked away genuinely impressed by how they carried themselves. I’d even get asked for advice at conferences where I was the keynote. People were curious—especially when I told them my parenting system was based on techniques I developed as a Navy SEAL sniper instructor—and would always dig deeper, asking more questions.

So I finally decided to write this book and share my experience as a father. I’m not a parenting academic. Through most of my kids’ early lives, I was a divorced dad. But as my kids developed into capable young adults, it became clear that their mom and I had done something right. I felt like I had something to offer other parents on their journey, sharing my own messy parenting experience and all the lessons I’ve learned along the way.

There’s no greater mission, as a parent, than raising a child who knows who they are and has the tools to thrive and become the captain of their own life. It’s an amazing feeling when your kids grow up and blossom into happy adults, and you realize they are truly prepared to handle the world on their terms. And that’s the real goal: you must prepare your children for the world, not protect them from it.

I still remember my daughter Madison visiting me in 2024 during her summer break from Goldsmiths, University of London, where she was a design student. Over dinner at my favorite French restaurant, Grenache, in Lisbon, she told me, “Dad, I just want you to know I am exactly where I want to be in my life, and I appreciate you allowing me to be myself.”

What an amazing thing to hear as a parent.

It’s these moments that powerfully reveal the return on our investment for all those

years of being a consistent parent who shows up every day.

By guiding our children to becoming happy adults, we’re not just shaping their future either—we’re contributing to a stronger, more compassionate humanity. I think we can all agree that, considering the state of the world, this is a good thing.